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My husband is anorexic. He won't get help. We've been going through this for five years. He's 5'9" and weighs 108 pounds.

He won't eat meat, fish, shellfish, peanuts, tree nuts, corn, black beans, cheese, milk, eggs, yogurt, artificial flavor, artificial color, soy, rice, non-whole grains, MSG, sugar, corn syrup, artificial sweeteners, oregano, pepper, mushrooms, or any kind of preservative.

I'm a health nut and don't eat a lot of those foods, either, but I can't keep adjusting my diet to accommodate his needs. Last night he screamed at me for an hour because I made a casserole that had soy-meat in it. I don't know what else to cook. I really wanted to make that casserole.

I need to eat and so does our toddler. He started screaming at me that I was going to give my toddler and myself cancer because of the estrogen-like compounds in soy.

(The irony is that he smokes and has a fit if I ask him not to do it around the baby.)

I really don't know what to do. I could tolerate his eating disorder when he was only controlling HIS diet, but I can't starve myself to death and only make the few foods that he'll eat.

He absolutely refuses to get help because he says there's nothing wrong. I don't know what to do. I said "in sickness and in health"... That's supposed to include eating disorders, I guess, but I shouldn't be forced to be anorexic just because he is.

Please help. =(
i think that you should do whatever you have to, to keep you and your child healthy if there was some way to show him how silly he is being like finding a web page on the internet that shows the benefits of soy and show it to him i would suggest that because a person cant survive without the right nutrition
i hoped this helped a little
If I had a spouse like that I would say "You know what? F**k this, I'll make all the casseroles I want for myself and the toddler, and you can make whatever you *insert more swear words* want for dinner." Just because you are in a marriage with this guy doesn't mean you have to bow down and do his bidding.

And I would definitely bring up the smoking thing a lot more. Smoking is far more worse than some preservatives or herbs (Really? Oregano? Rice? What does he live on, air?) Practically all foods are healthier for the toddler than having second hand smoke blowing in his (her?) face. Heck, sugar in small doses is probably more healthier than smoking.
Make it clear you realize he has a problem and needs to get help. You cannot continue to help his eating disorder control his life. And it certainly cannot control yours. He needs help and he knows it, but he cannot admit it right now. You need to give him a reason to get it, and that might include you threatening to leave him. Tell him you have to because his disorder is effecting your child. Your child has to come first, and right now, the only thing that matters to him is his eating disorder.

Can I recommend a good book? It's called "The Secret Language of Eating Disorders." Read it, then give it to him. He won't want to read it, but at the same time, he will.

BTW, he smokes because he thinks it will lessen the hunger pains he feels.
Oh take care of your child by going through compromise with your husband. The awesome Culture Channel is a fine creative forum place. And sure, in another word choice it must be said though, this is a nice place to have really merry times. Anyway, Kids Chairs is a nice place to visit for a moment while for all hope anyway, right? Please start posting here whatever topics you are expert at and surely must share with us in this great forum happy Aqua bye, great fun and joy.
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